I.] DECEMBER 2005. It's December 12 and my airconditioner is on full blast. Outside of the car, locals saunter up and down sunset blvd in shorts and tommy bahamas shirts. Summer in December but it also took 1/2 hour to move 3 miles.... Eaglerock/colorado on a friday night what a ghost town, save for the chalet... karen and her sisters made dinner for us at their place tonight- pasta, chicken salad, and homemade apple pie. I miss hot home cooked meals.

II.]

In 1862, in the midst of the Civil War, Congress authorized the most ambitious project that the country had ever contemplated: construction of a transcontinental railroad. The price tag was immense: $136 million, more than twice the federal budget in 1861. The challenge was enormous; 1,800 miles across arid plains and desert and the rugged granite walls of the Sierra Nevada and Rocky Mountains. The Central Pacific lay track eastward from Sacramento, California. Which ever company laid the most track would receive the largest federal subsidy.The Union Pacific's task was easier; two-thirds of its track was laid across plains. The Central Pacific, in contrast, had to carve out a rail bed across the Sierra Nevadas. The first year, it lay 31 miles of track; after two years, it had only put down 50 miles.The Central Pacific also faced an acute labor shortage. In the winter of 1864, the company had only 600 laborers at work, a small fraction of the 5,000 for which it had advertised. And these workers were unreliable: "Some would stay until pay day, get a little money, get drunk and clear out," a superintendent said.

In February, 1865, the Central Pacific decided to try a new labor pool. Charles Crocker, chief of construction persuaded his company to employ Chinese immigrants, arguing that the people who build the Great Wall of China and invented gunpowder could certainly build a railroad. Beginning in the mid-nineteenth century, civil turmoil and poverty had led many Chinese to emigrate to California, the "Golden Mountain." As early as 1852, there were 25,000 Chinese immigrants in California. Most came from China's southeastern coast. The overwhelming majority were married men who planned to return to China. In California, the immigrants established support networks, based on family ties and place of origin, and found work in agriculture, mines, domestic service, and increasingly in railroad construction.

III.] In December you look back in your rearview mirror. Hastily, I left a place of comfort and family to new angeles where i have no roots, paying bills cooking chicken and brocoli, learning to live with party animals. Sunday night and nate has 6 people over boozing in front of the boob tube, the fireplace of our generation.

2005 yearbook

Act One
- Tsunami torments east asia
- Get a job in campbell and cupertino boring kids with worksheets.
- Darius auditions for apprentice 4.
- Grampa dies
- Josh back in the bay after 15 year hiatus. fun at north beach filmore and mtn charleys- los gatos-saratoga. josh and michael w- shake hands at the burlingame hilton.
- Visit Victor and Christina in northridge; Matt gives chico tours
- Esl kids gives me standing ovation at schmeland. asian kids are the best.

Act Two
- Nearly kill myself skating down a snyvale parking garage.
- Drive by south central job interview a done deal. i leave sj at 7 am for the 1 o'clock interview.
- Brian completes grueling missionary trip in the phillipine ghetto.
- Crash at scott and marias for a week before getting my own place. sleep on the floor for a month- buy a serta mattress in west hollywood.
- La nightlife is a strain on the wallet
- Alfredo and miniature golf in sherman oaks.
- Chris and me, imperial rolls in westminster and v20 long beach.
- i learn to appreciate earplugs in my apartment.

Act Three
- Dates with thai girl in silverlake doesnt last. her rotweiller nearly takes off my ear.
- Missed eisley at the troubadour, got a free t-shirt
- Brush with celebrity: jessica alba on jay leno, paris hilton and hilary duff vamping on the red carpet.
- Gramma dies
- Anthony's costume party in in huntington
- Aunt anne, uncle long, gramma crash at my place.
- Ma and Pa give a warm homecoming

1.) NOVEMBER 2005. Said goodbye to cousins aunts uncles parents brothers all weekend long. it would be ideal if we all lived in the same zipcode but i can't do that. the silicon valley is eating me alive. my pop, his personality is engineering. For him the silicon valley is his niche, the place he's called home for 35 years. My frame of mind is entertainments- movies books music- l.a. that's why i'm here. in the old days ponytailed lemonfaced characters from china came to the golden mountain to work on the railroad and bring treasure back to the motherland. is history repeating herself? the worst part about living in l.a. ain't the traffic smog or fake people, it's being away from family. when i fatten up my checking account maybe i'll go back. ..The first day of work back from vacation was not gentle on my ulcers. the moment i turn my back is when i find a knife in it.

2.) With the demise of Halloween and the clearing of pumpkin patches, the city is clearing way for turkeys and christmas trees. At the fairfax Grove the lawn area is fenced off as men in yellow hard hats prop this years soaring redwood in the middle of the square. Friday night Margaret Cho made a quick appearance, blasting Hollywood for keeping Asians boxed into stereotypes in television programs and movies. Cho confessed that yellowface roles were better than absolute invisibility. Before that Gore Vidal dropped into Dutton's in Beverly Hills to plug his new book. the dude sitting in front of me had a huge f#cking fro....and Western university's homecoming game. Eagle Rock is a trip down memory lane: that's where i had lunch; i left that doorway every afternoon at 3:30; that's where i got hammered and passed out during Sex on the Beach.

A.) OCTOBER 2005. My roommate nate does not need sleep. He had an exclusive close friends only halloween party last night deep in the Hollywood hills. He came back with a pack of swingers at 6am. i know this because that's exactly when i was prompted to stuff two towels in the crack under the door and jam two earplugs in my head. He and his friends spent the next 4 hours or so talking about loose women they just screwed and who was a surebet to take the heisman, then a call on the blackberry. ..I took the 110 down to Huntington Beach with a bottle of wine and a bag of twizzlers for Anthony's Halloween pow wow. I met his teacher friends and knocked back a couple frosties and sat pretty for the rest of the night listening to adventures on the Blue Line which passes through Inglewood, Watts, Compton and is the transportation of choice of a psycho who gets his rocks off popping his glass eye out. I've lowered the bar at work- makes life so much easier.

B.) On Saturday we had a funeral service for my late grandma. Karen and Burt put together a slide show for the wake.

C.) I happen to live on the second floor and a nice balcony shaded by palm trees. This place almost burned down two years ago when Nate's' friend dropped a lit match on the floor and went inside; you can still see black smoke stains from the accident. Last night, Cody got drunk and jumped off our balcony with a beer in his hand. he left two monster footprints on the grassy lawn in front of our landlord's room. At the party down the hall i met a couple of teachers sucking on coronas from out of town- Chicago and Jersey to work in Beverly Hills.

D.) Last weekend i braved the Five and returned to the Bay Area, visiting my ailing grandmother. It's not easy getting old- never was. Gramma is bed ridden and has all kinds of tubes sticking in her. She greeted us with a smile. Ma gave gramma a hair cut in her nursing home in the city. The place is very depressing but since when are nursing homes a bundle of fun. Rebecca had a birthday on Saturday and we had a meal that could choke a pig in Daly City. Chris and Qui were there too. The weekend prior, Chris brought me to the chic dance club V20 in Long Beach. one of the best night clubs i've been to so far. Thumping beats, erotique dancing, strobe lights, go-go dancers- who could ask for anything more. fellas beware- don't wear sneakers or you may be banned. In other news I got tickets to see Jay Leno at the NBC studios in Burbank. The special guest was Jessica Alba. she's got bad posture, needs to sit up straight. jay can't shine conan's shoes when it comes to comedy but he's a much nicer guy. He came out to greet us before the show in a denim outfit. He broke the ice with the studio audience and took a few polaroids with us before strapping on the monkey suit. Arnold Scharweznegger, Nick Lachey, and Billy bob Thornton made cameos to sign the katrina bike. The nbc studios is only a few miles from where i 'm shacked up.

SEPTEMBER 2005. Nate went out to see Dave Matthews with an escalade full of friends. i, on the other hand, went to the Silverlake Street festival and met another gregarious ex-pat new yorker bachelor in his fifties. i'm standing on the sidewalk by the port o potty waiting for jenny lewis to come on and this guy takes one look at me and starts playing 20 questions. At first i was like oh shit another quikstar hustler, but he turned out alright in the end. We parted as friends and he gave me his card. i also ran into an old college associate Donny T from my Visions of Utopia seminar. Same old Donny. Rilo Kiley did come on after all- it was an ok show with fans packed like sardines in the crowded street. it seemed like all of L.A. was squeezed into that section of Sunset... So many beautiful women in summer dresses and beach tans. School starts for most this monday so one last hurrah at this free annual outdoor bonanza. The performer herself was nowhere as memserizing as Adriana Evans at The Temple. Gosh I was hooked on evans- what a voice! what a performer! that girl could please a crowd. Even The Hanks at the Troubadour had a more driving energy than Kiley. eh. different strokes for different folks.

Still, this event is the biggest i've ever been to so far. Bigger than the X games, bigger than the Espy awards, bigger than the crafts festivals at Malibu and Laguna Beach. It was about the size of the gay pride parade in San Francisco- just thousands and thousands of people. Which reminds me there was a section tonight sponsored by The Echo Club playing catchy gay electronica. Driving back home from the party i was struck by how remarkable L.A.'s streets look at night. even though there are too many cars on the road there is a throbbing pulse about the city that you just can't find in the suburbia of Pasadena and Manhattan Beach. drive down sunset at night. Try franklin street on a sunday afternoon. Suffice to say, i still cant decide the best place to set up camp.

1.) AUGUST 2005. Monday night. i tried to catch the eisley show at the troubadour on the edge of doheny/santamonica. no such luck. the line wrapped around the corner. all i got out of it was a lousy t-shirt. i saw the band members outside that was all. there were dozens of people turned away. on the way back i stopped by the formosa bar. old hollywood pictures marilyn monroe, edward robinson, sinatra all these candid shots cover the formosa walls. this joint is across the street from the old warner lot. the place was dead though. i wouldn't be surprised if it goes the way of the derby, bulldozered and turned into a cluster of condos. That's what happened to the old gershwin house in beverly hills. preservationists want to hang on to these historic buildings. i don't know how i feel about it. these old bars and restaurants need to be renovated. it's a town of ghosts. the new generations they don't give a crap about the formosa bar.

2.) Oh Lord i had bad dreams this morning. maybe it was because i slept right on through the 9:00 church service. the dream: it was early afternoon in the classroom and my kids were gnashing their teeth while tearing the room apart like wolves. As glorious fortune would have it, my supervisor walks in with a clipboard shaking her head and filling out my pink slip. i wake up and it's already 11:15am- i never sleep in that late. waking up at 9am is the best on a sunday. 8:30am would be the most ideal. 8 feels too much like a school day (despite the fact that i'm up by 6:30 on weekdays).

last night i was up late with a friend of mine i met at a sandwich and coffee shop. She brought me to this thai restaurant off the corner of Sunset/ Fountain in Silverlake. Thai karaoke was blaring and i was the only moron there who couldn't speak Thai. it was her friend's birthday and so it was that a small group gathered around a row of square tables. I still had a good time and enjoyed some excellent thai eatins- raw shrimp, fried tofu, bbqed pork with the crispy skin and ice cream cake. i was buzzin nice off just one Thai beer and music is music- language doesnt matter. if i were to make gross generalization just based on last night's experience, i would say that the Thai people are a generous fun-loving bunch with great taste in fashion and cuisine. i was accepted as family and i don't even speak a lick of Thai nor did i know Marissa's friends whatsoever.

3.) Ever since coming to LA i've made efforts to branch out and try everything. this evening i invited my roommate out to eat but he already had a dinner date scheduled. i went out on my own towards the miracle mile district by the la county museum of art, thinking there to be a wednesday night event. alas, the egg was on my face. it was as dead as a doorstop. dead as the wooly mammoth sinking in that tar pit in la brea. Dejected i drove up the other end of la brea and decided it was time to try the world famous Pink's chili cheese dogs. What a line this Pink's had. i never waited an hour for a friggin hot dog in my life. But when in Rome right? my feet were sore after the first 1/2 hour of standing. it was like waiting for a baby to come out of the oven. to add insult to injury the hebrew national dogs at costco taste better than these famous dogs so-called.

This is what we call growing pains- when a newbie comes to a new place and goes through some hard knocks before settling in. as promised, i did get my jollies in Irvine many weeks ago. Chris brought me to this amazing Vietnamese restaurant where we sank our teeth into freshly made imperial rolls. afterwards he brought me to huntington beach and invited me to a farewell party for a friend of his. in northridge anthony, victor and i drove around for several hours before deciding to watch jessica alba strut her stuff in the fantastic four. what a movie! On another weekend Alfredo took me to white castle golf and games where i suspect they shot scenes for the karate kid, featuring the timeless elizabeth shue. yes it's not just all business here in hollywoodland. there are fun things to do and bars to frequent.

A.) JULY 2005. Almost four weeks have gone by since i left for los angeles. I still have no internet but there's a guy coming in next week to set up the phone jacks in my room in west hollywood. Maybe i took it for granted that everyone uses internet in this day and age. But my partment mate- he checks his email at work downtown and he doesnt have much use for it at home. Nick has a birthday party this weekend and next. Work what can i say about work. There are many cats who are plain fed up with the higherups and how things are run. I went to my first union meeting today and cohorts were pissed about overcrowded rooms and hellraiser kids. At Career Inc for the most part, you really are more of a cop than an educator. When i was younger, I fancied working at an inner city school b/c of those bleeding heart lib ideals. Today i don't know how much longer i can take it. My assignments are not particularly big but the kids i deal with don't want to be here. To make matters worse, it's near impossible to throw out the troublemakers b/c the bureau wants us to be sensitive.

Basic things don't work- like textbooks and copy machines. you want to do a good job but you can't because nothing works and every thing is broken or covered in graffiti. But it's not all bad. there are kids who genuinely want to learn and you see the lightbulb going on and it sends the message- you're not completely wasting your time. so that's my job. you get one hell of a workout yelling and acting like a zookeeper. after work i get a chance to work on my cooking skills or lack thereof. so far chicken is a popular selection. Fowl mixed with something green (brocoli, spinach) and washed down with a cold glass of milk. Depending on my mood, the microwave is another way to have a fast and hearty meal made up of leftovers. i do dishes as fast as i can and will often eat in front of the tube- a lazy habit that i'm trying to fix. the other night i parked on the sunset strip and went to Cabo's- they dish out a killer steak burrito there and what's more- the waitress who served me was some supermodel in training. Yet on the whole i haven't see too many people my age around the freeplaces (coffeeshops, bookstores, the mall)- everyone's either too old or too young. my peers will cluster around la cienega, sunset strip, melrose, hollywood barneys. on nights i don't feel like cooking i'll go across the street- astro burgers on smonica. Hillary Swank drove directly to Astro's right after she won her oscar. As far as celebrity sightings- i've only seen that black guy who does anti-piracy ads in the movies. "you steal a candy bar from a store or download a movie- it's stealing" that guy.

B.) Made it through the first day of work! Things are going slowly but surely- I still haven't found a place yet but Uncle Scott and Maria are very generous sharing their home with me. I didnt expect paradise when i got here and that's what I have now. Some things are good, some things suck eggs. For every 8 good things that happen, 2 terrible things happen. It takes great will power to focus on the eight and ignore the 2. Still it would be nice to have my own place. i feel like a river rat carrying his life in the back of his trunk. getting a place would be easier if i wasnt busting my onions all day at work. Commute was ok- 30 minutes in the morning. could be worse. my classes are small too. i need to do something fun this weekend. from the 10 freeway to the comfort of your home.

C.) Brian forwarded this email from Manila weeks ago:

The Philippines is hot and humid but nice! I never knew I could sweat so much. Sweat drenches my body and my clothes like every two hours, we really have to drink lots of water and eat salty stuff. Yesterday, Sunday we visited one of the communities named welfareville, and attended Church there. I was blown away but how the people live, they don't have running water, their is so much pollution, waste, the weather is really hot and it rains, and yet these people make a really great effort to appear presentable and clean.... In Manila there are 18 million people, and in each of these poor communities like 200-300 families pack in a block. I praise God for the privilege and chance to serve Him and serve amongst these people. It's been a challenge for my team to unify with our different personalities and styles, but praise God, as we pray together each day, and do activities together, God has been sharpening and stretching us, and working on our character.

I.) JUNE 2005. So it happened and i haven't had any time to enjoy it because i've been so busy scrambling from one task to the next. By the way, i have to get ripped off at a medical clinic in 45 minutes to prepare for my new job. Yes I got a new job! It's in the heart of LA and I'm moving early next week! The whole interview process happened so fast. A barely air-conditioned building in South Central. A small cramped room with one window. 80-90 sweaty adults in business suits waiting in silence and fear to be interrogated by the powers that be. Luckily i went in and out and hit a homer on my first at bat. My employers to-be liked what they saw, recognized i could read and write and said congratulations we want you at our place. But i'm not out of the frying pan yet. I still don't have a permanent place to stay and my current employer is pissed off that i didnt give them 2 weeks notice, and i have a rash on my left buttcheek but i'm moving to LA!!!! In one week's time i'll be a rested happy camper.

II.) These days writing feels a lot like skating. i do it for a 1/2 hour and have some fun. When it gets boring i quit. I've stopped beating myself about writing. As strange as it sounds, i actually find more joy in preparing for class lessons. it's much more interactive the Q&A sessions between you and others. When you boil it down- writing is very much a solitary activity... I just read an interview with David Chase head writer of the Sopranos to leech off some inspiration. His family name was Decesare before a relative americanized it. i've put some thought into a pen name for myself but at the rate i'm going now maybe i won't even need it. Suffice to say, writing becomes a chore way too often. And when it becomes a chore forget about it, just go out and skate.

III.) School's almost out. Back to working on the script on unemployment. Michael just submitted a short story about one man's brush with 9/11 and Ken just finished directing a successful play in New York. I feel like such a slacker, but the fact of the matter is that it's very difficult to juggle two canteloupes at once. I have my job job and my hobby job to balance. The hobby job takes a back seat to the job job, but what a job job it is. I'll miss the coworkers. They had spirit, energy, showered me with farewells. ... In other news Friday night I was invited to Gabe's birthday party at Stanford where I met his fiancee Jen. Later we went cosmic bowling to further contribute to kicking my self esteem in the crotch... Brian and Matt are in the Far East saving souls- we'll be praying for you... On a sadder note, condolences to Karen, Burt and Uncle during this difficult time. Auntie was a great lady.

Currently Reading: Top 10 Los Angeles
Catherine Gerber

1.) JUNE 2005. Josh has been moaning for a new post so here it is- Memorial Day weekend was a full plate loaded with tomatoes. On friday we hit blue chalk near stanford and watched a young woman give her boyfriend a lap dance right in front of us. We didn't "get any bites" but imagined how cool it would've been if we did. I dropped him off, went home, hit the sack, and watched nypd blue until i conked out. That's the kind of show that makes you wanna be a cop.... On Saturday I met with Jennifer at Santana Row and we talked about the new chapters in our lives. it's a fresh start in our careers and everything is new again. Later that evening we cheered for Rebecca in Davis. Sunday I went to see gramma and a family friend from Stockton and played frisbee with Benny and Leo. Great dim sum by the way. i entertained about 15 different shrimp dishes. We visited auntie 2 as well- Please keep auntie 2 in your thoughts; she's going through a tough time.... Monday was spent with Woody up in the Marina. He showed me his bachelor pad and i turned green with envy. I guess Sully is setting up a hot dog stand franchise in Phoenix. we should have a reunion, bring all the guys back together, just like the old days. Meanwhile i'm packing my things in my mind- what is essential? what can i buy down in l.a? wow. this is really happening.

2.) I just completed the 800 pound gorilla portion of my internship at work- that's a full load off my chest. But it's not over yet- in this business you can never be too sure about anything until the last minute of the last day, and even then- don't hold your breath. With my luck, disaster will strike fierce without a moment's notice. Who gives a crap anyway? you do the best you can, and if that's not good enough f#ck em all. that's what i've always said. In other news we gave blue chalk another shake and after determining that it was the Silicon Valley Sausage Convention, got out of there met up with Sri for a quick gab and then counted sheep until the morning.

3.) I visited Victor and Christina down in northridge this weekend. they were both very busy with school but managed to tolerate an hour in west hollywood with me. We all got a closer look at the gay male nightlife. Gay men seem more civilized than straight men at bars and clubs. Darius Josh and i were at a straight bar in san jose and nearly got a piece of wood shoved up our collective asses. I scoured the west l.a. scene and have decided that the best place to live is between venice and santa monica. in between these two beaches you have a section of town that is a good blend of rich and poor. plus it's really close to ucla and hollywood....hollywood blvd at night is a scary place indeed. it's like busloads of thugs come in from inglewood and watts and crash on the sidewalks across from the kodak theater just looking to pick a fight. i noticed it's better one street up on franklin avenue. i'm still looking for that right niche in between getting hit on by gay guys and getting tossed over the side of the road by gangbangers.

I.) JANUARY 2005. I'm going to LA. i need to go somewhere different and do something new. i feel a terrible claustrophobia here, like water that's been sitting in a moldy plastic bucket for 4 wasted years. And when i'm down there will it suck? yeah sure, but at least it'll feel like i tried to get myself out of this hole. Having said that, we had an "incredible" time in Gatos last weekend- gorgeous underwear models. decent female to male ratio. beautiful rejection when this hot genentech gal told me to piss off eat shit and die.... Josh is back in town after 15 years. We went out on the town the last few days hitting the major local attractions- santana, tres gringos, metreon, and north beach. There was a funny situation at tres gringos when a neanderthal gorilla walked up to us and tried to pick a fight. Man i really wanted to lay him out but he would have killed me in that would be the end of it. This is why i'm a big fan of the second amendment.

II.) Grampa Leon died in his hospital bed last week. His funeral is this Saturday. He will be deeply missed. The first memory with Gung Gung goes back to when i was a small child, when he was strong. He would always make this big bowl of jook for me and i wasn't crazy about jook. He fed me slowly, scooping the outside layer of the bowl first- so that i wouldn't burn my tongue. He was a good man, Gung Gung, and a caring grandfather. someday we'll meet again.

A.) OCTOBER 2004. This afternoon after a 5k race at Stanford Stadium (where i watched passively and munched on Hobees pound cake), I joined Matthew T and Jason D up in the city with a number of Best Western alums. a plus in the the garlic fries department. ...Boston 2-0. I have been keeping tabs on the World Series via the radio. I became more interested in stadium sports in general after seeing the giants diamondbacks game with Matthew and Brian months ago. i'm fascinated by the avid fanbase- the feeling of being a part of something bigger than yourself. ... My dinners with dear pa pa are typically filled with awkward silences but today we ventured down memory lane and swapped snapshots of chinese school from the eighties- oh the agony of weekend torture sessions by the Seng On Market. There was a teacher who brought gifts for the top three students at the end of each semester including a diary, two composition books, and a pink or blue hello kitty pen. The girls won every year i think. ..There's a saying among schoolmasters- don't smile until May.

Currently Playing: The Snow Maiden- Dance of the Tumblers
by Rimsky Korsakov

1.) SEPTEMBER 2004. Over the weekend, I met up with Michael W and homestead running buddy Darius S. and we decided upon Yankee Pier at glamorous Santana Row where Michael ponied up $30 bucks for a halibut the size of an anchovie. If he was upset about this he didnt show it-Michael and I, we met doing track in the seventh grade, and we went to Yosemite science camp and then said our goodbyes- different high schools. Darius i've known since the 4th grade, he was the one with the brady bunch magic show idea. He's a funny guy, ought to do stand up.

...What a drive down I- Five to Diego to see Brian move into his new place at Roosevelt. It's a real clean sexy place, a cat's swing to the library and student union. On campus, Brian showed me the hill where he almost killed himself with that old p.o.s. skateboard. 20 paces from where he fell there was a marked tomb of the last guy who died skating down that same hill. The weekend's highlight was at the Diego Zoo watching the hippopotami dance underwater. It was amazing- this one potami flipped over on its back underwater and farted two huge air bubbles out of his nose! The panda bears were tiny and the polar bear was on crack dancing back and forth. In addition to moving in, sightseeing, and Costco-Ranch 99 slumming, we hit the Diego beachfronts like regular beach bums. La Jolla cove at sundown, got attacked by wet dogs at Del Mar, enjoyed a curvy woman practing yoga at the Pacific. ... Saturday Matthew, Brian and I took the muni from Giants Stadium to Judah in the late afternoon- it was a sunny sunny day as we passed the pier & ghiladerhi square, seeing tourists flock towards lemonade stands in groves. who needs cars when you have a bus full of strangers. We spent the day at the ballgame as the Giants came from a 7-1 deficit to best the Diamondbacks 9-7 by the bottom of the eighth. Kudos to Matthew and the charity of his Chico comrades.

Currently Playing: Waterloo Sunset
by Ray Davies